OK
I'm going to attempt to drown myself
You can try this at home
You can be just like me
Mic check one two
We recording?
[Verse 1:]
I'm cancerous
So when I diss
You wouldn't want to answer this
If you responded back with a battle rap
You wrote for Canibus
I strangle you to death
Then I choke you again
And break your fuckin' legs
'til your bones poke through your skin
You beef with me
I'mma even the score equally
Take you on Jerry Springer
And beat your ass legally
I get you blunted off of funny home grown
Cause when I smoke out
I hit the trees harder than Sonny Bono (oh no!)
So if I said I never did drugs
That would mean I lie
And get fucked more than the President does
Hilary Clinton tried to slap me
And call me a pervert
I ripped her fucking tonsils out
And fed her sherbet (bitch!)
My nerves hurt and, lately, I'm on edge
Grabbed Vanilla Ice
And ripped out his blond dreads (Fuck you!)
Every girl I ever went out with has gone lez
Follow me and do exactly what the song says
Smoke weed, take pills
Drop out of school, kill people and drink
Jump behind the wheel like it was still legal
I'm dumb enough to walk in a store and steal
So I'm dumb enough to ask for a date with Lauryn Hill
Some people only see that I'm white, ignoring skill
Cause I stand out
Like a green hat with a orange bill
But I don't get pissed
Y'all don't even see through the mist
How the fuck can I be white?
I don't even exist
I get a clean shave, bathe, go to a rave
Die from an overdose
And dig myself up out of my grave
My middle finger won't go down...
How do I wave?
And this is how I'm supposed to teach kids how to behave?
[Hook 1:]
Now follow me and do exactly what you see
Don't you want to grow up to be just like me?
I slap women and eat 'shrooms then O.D
Now don't you want to grow up to be just like me?
[Verse 2:]
Me and Marcus Allen went over to see Nicole
When we heard a knock at the door
Must have been Ron Gold
Jumped behind the door, put the orgy on hold
Killed them both and smeared blood
In a white Bronco (we did it)
My mind won't work if my spine don't jerk
I slapped Garth Brooks out of his rhinestone shirt
I'm not a player just a ill rhyme sayer
That'll spray a Aerosol can up at the ozone layer
My rap style's warped
I'm running out the morgue
With your dead grandmother's corpse
To throw it on your porch
Jumped in a Chickenhawk cartoon with a cape on
And beat up Foghorn Leghorn with an acorn
I'm about as normal as Norman Bates
With deformative traits
A premature birth that was four minutes late
Mother, are you there? I love you
I never meant to hit you over the head with that shovel
Will someone please explain to my brain
That I just severed a main vein
With a chainsaw and I'm in pain?!
I take a breather and sigh
Either I'm high or I'm nuts
Cause if you ain't tilting this room, neither am I
So when you see your mom
With a thermometer shoved in her ass
Then it probably is obvious I got it on with her
Cause when I drop this solo shit it's over with
I bought Cage's tape, opened it and dubbed over it
[Hook 2:]
I came to the club drunk with a fake ID
Don't you want to grow up to be just like me?
I've been with 10 women who got HIV
Now don't you want to grow up to be just like me?
I got genital warts and it burns when I pee
Don't you want to grow up to be just like me?
I tie a rope around my penis and jump from a tree
You probably want to grow up to be just like me
