H. CHANDLER:
Are we gonna have a problem?
You got a bone to pick?
You’ve come so far,
Why now are you pulling on my dick?
I’d normally slap your face off,
And everyone here could watch.
But I’m feeling nice.
Here’s some advice.
Listen up, biatch!
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Lookin’ hot
Buying stuff they cannot
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Drinkin’ hard
Maxin’ Dad’s credit card
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Skippin’ gym
Scaring her
Screwing him
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Killer clothes
HEATHERS:
Kickin’ nerds in the nose!
H. CHANDLER:
If you lack the balls
You can go play dolls
Let your mommy fix you a snack
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
Woah!
H. CHANDLER:
Or you could come smoke
Pound some rum and coke
In my Porsha with the quarterback
HEATHERS:
Woah! Woah! Woah!
Honey, whatchu waitin’ for?
Welcome to my candy store
It’s time for you to prove
You’re not a loser anymore
Then step into my candy store
H. CHANDLER & H. MCNAMARA:
Guys fall
H. DUKE:
At your feet
Pay the check
H. MCNAMARA:
Help you cheat
HEATHERS:
All you
H. DUKE:
Have to do
H. CHANDLER:
Say goodbye to Shamoo
HEATHERS:
That freak’s
H. MCNAMARA:
Not your friend
I can tell in the end
HEATHERS:
If she
H. MCNAMARA:
Had your shot
HEATHERS:
She would leave you to rot
H. MCNAMARA:
‘Course if you don’t care
Fine! Go braid her hair
Maybe Sesame Street is on
HEATHERS:
Woah!
H. MCNAMARA:
Or forget the creep
H. DUKE:
And get in my jeep
H. CHANDLER:
Let’s go tear up someone’s lawn
HEATHERS:
Woah! Woah! Woah!
Honey, whatchu waitin’ for?
Welcome to my candy store
You just gotta prove
You’re not a pussy anymore
Then step into my candy store
H. CHANDLER:
You can join the team
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
Or you can bitch and moan
H. CHANDLER:
You can live the dream
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
Or you can die alone
H. CHANDLER:
You can fly with eagles
HEATHERS:
Or if you prefer
H. CHANDLER:
Keep on testing me
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
And end up like her!
MARTHA:
Veronica, look!
Ram invited me to his homecoming party.
This proves he’s been thinking about me.
VERONICA:
Color me stoked.
MARTHA:
I’m so happy!
HEATHERS:
Woah!
H. DUKE:
Honey, whachu waiting fo—
H. CHANDLER:
SHUT UP, HEATHER!
HEATHERS:
Step into my candy store! Time for you to prove
Oooh woah! Woah oh oh!
You’re not a lame ass anymore
Then step into my candy store
It’s my candy store
It’s my candy
It’s my candy store
It’s my candy
It’s my candy store